1. You have more dog beds, chew toys,
collars, leashes, harnesses, and dog crates than you have dogs.
2. You meet other people with dogs, and
remember their dog's call name after 30 seconds, but don't get the
owner/handler's name until you've met them 2 or 3 times.
3. You don't think twice about trading licks
of an ice cream cone with your dog.
4. Your parents give up on grandchildren and
start to refer to your dogs as "your kids" or your children."
(Bonus: they start to call them "our granddogs.")
5. 90 percent of your Internet connection
time goes to the dogs (seeing what's new when you enter your breed into the
browser, reading up on multiple lists, checking out photos, sounds and FAQs,
etc.).
6. You have hundreds of pictures of your dogs
on your desk at work, in your wallet, etc., but none of your family or
yourself.
7. No one wants to ride in your car because
they know they'll get dog hair on their clothes.
8. You reach into your pockets for change,
and liver treats, dog kibble, and pick-up bags fall all over. (Bonus: You've
done this in a classy establishment.)
9. You've had long meaningful discussions
with your friends on the best way to trim your dog's nails, but have never had
a manicure or pedicure in your lifetime.
10. Books and movies are ruined for you if
the dog references are incorrect.
11. The highlight of your day is spending
time with your dog.
12. You watch simply awful movies because
your breed is either featured in a cameo scene or there's a 3-second camera
shot during a crowd scene.
13. All of your clothes have dog hair on
them, even when they come back from the laundromat or dry cleaners.
14. The only thing your friends, colleagues,
and passing acquaintances say to you when they see you is, "How are the
dogs?" or "How many dogs do you have now?"
15. Your photo Christmas cards feature your
dogs (humans optional).
